Thursday, January 5, 2012


Back several months ago when we first started taking beginning adult gymnastics class, my sister and I came up with something we called The Handstand Plan: We wanted to be able to do handstands at the same time on the beach during our Florida vacation, and have pictures to prove it. The only thing standing between us and the successful completion of The Handstand Plan was that we would need to be able to hold the handstand for at least 1/10 of a second so that the photo could be taken. Clearly we had our work cut out for us.

The thing is, handstands are hard. I don't know if you know this or not, but handstands actually require propelling yourself into an upside down position. That just seems fundamentally wrong at a very basic level, doesn't it? Rick Santorum probably thinks handstands are an unpardonable sin against God. I'm not so sure I disagree with him.

By the way, I noticed that somebody found their way to my blog by googling the phrase "why don't we vomit when we handstand?" I don't know, but Rick Santorum probably has an opinion on that.

And as hard as handstands are, cartwheels are a lot harder. You might remember my video from this post where I show off my poor cartwheel skills. Cartwheels are particularly frustrating because many eight year olds can do respectable cartwheels, and as a reasonably high-functioning adult, I expect to be able to do most of the things an eight year old can do AND make mortgage payments at the same time. I'm proud to say that over time and after a lot of hard work, my cartwheel has improved to the point where I look like a frog having only a mild seizure.

Back to The Handstand Plan, a phrase I'm going to copyright as soon as I get around to it. The number of family members interested in participating in The Handstand Plan grew to four, which meant it would be that much harder getting a picture with us all up in a handstand at the same time. But having four people participating also made the story of The Handstand Plan that much more compelling, and I figured it increased the chances our little adventure would get made into a movie. I would like to be played by one of the Olsen twins, ideally Mary-Kate.

Here we are in Florida, trying to put The Handstand Plan into action. From left to right is my sister-in-law Margaret, me, my sister, and my sister's boyfriend Casey.

On your marks, get set....OUCH. In the photo below, I leaned over too far and had to go into a forward roll, which is no big deal on a padded gym floor but is not as much fun when you do it on concrete-like wet sand. That is why you should always wear a helmet when you go do gymnastics on the beach.

This time we're going to do it!....or not.

One last time...and we're up! The Handstand Plan is complete!

It's not perfect. My sister has a weird cross-leg thing going on and Casey has never really figured out how to get completely straightened out in a handstand. But we are all unequivocally doing a handstand on the beach in Floirda, and that's what The Handstand Plan was all about.

My handstand in this picture, of course, is practically Olympic caliber. In other words, it's almost as good as an eight-year old's. Even Rick Santorum would agree with that.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, seeing my upside down ass on the Internet is really good motivation to get back in shape. Thanks for that, TC!